Season Finale Trailer Transcript

*Open on clip from episode 9. Shannon, Reese, and Michael are on a zoom call. Shannon is wearing a baby blue shirt, Michael is wearing a green shirt, Reese is wearing a dark navy blue shirt and a sombrero. There is another picture of Shannon for some reason*

Shannon (in disbelief): "Bugs?"

Reese (quietly): "yeah"

Shannon (in slow motion, pitched down to sound deep): "BUGS? MY FANS DON'T WANNA HEAR ABOUT BUGS THEY WANT TO HEAR ABOUT ME"

*dramatic, cinematic music begins, a black screen appears that says "After weeks..." then fades to say "of groundbreaking content..."*

Michael (Voice over dubbed over the text): "The question this week? How do you guys feel about BETRAYAL?"

*text fades. New text appears that says "The Saga Comes To a Close"*

Reese (Voice over dubbed over the text, sounds distressed): "BUT I LOVE YOU!"

Shannon (Begins as voice over with the same text, but text fades out to reveal Shannon in floral aloha shirt shirt and sunglasses): "You guys have damaged things so bad, Bob the Builder won't be able to fix it" 

*screen fades to black and text appears that says "The Final Episode of Season One". That text fades and is replaced by "The End of the 30 Second Podcast". Someone singing "The 30 second pooooddcast" in a choral, black hawk down-esque way. Is that a weird description? Yes. But it's as close as I can get*

*Michael appears on screen wearing a black patterned shirt. Text is on top of him that says "Starring Michael Madsen"*

Michael: "I came here to save my wife and my two children!"

*Reese appears on screen wearing a black shirt, a white baseball cap, and headphones. Text is on top of him that says "Reese Paul"*

Reese (yelling): "I'm not a doctor. And I'm ALSO not a pilot!"

*Shannon appears on screen, wearing same aloha shirt and sunglasses. Text is on top of him that says "And Shannon Cantan"*

Shannon: "You think this is MY first disco? No. I've been boogie-woogy-ing ever since I could WALK, baby"

*music changes to a more fast paced, suspenseful violin score, background changes to footage of a drive up the coast of a beach*

*text appears over background: "Written by Woody Allen"*

*Michael appears on screen with a crazy look in his eyes, holding a large knife*

Michael: "HEEERE'S MIKEY"

*return to footage of coast drive*

*text appears over background: "Directed by Darren Aronofsky"*

*Shannon appears on screen, ultra zoomed in, all you can see is his glasses and part of his face*

Shannon: "It's burning- the house is burning"

*return to footage of coast drive*

*text appears over background: "A Unhappy Madison Production (You get the bit at this point)"*

*Reese appears on screen, dramatically turning to the camera*

Reese: "There's gold in those hills"

*return to footage of coast drive briefly, and then shows a globe with an arrow going from The Pyramids of Giza to Stonehenge. Footage of Reese replaces the background of the globe*

Reese (with distorted audio): "The will only had one name... Papa John."

*The globe and footage of Reese are replaced by footage of Shannon. He is in slow motion and there are beams of light edited around him*

Shannon: "OH! Duct tape not DUCK tape. Quack Quack."

*Footage of Shannon is replaced by footage of Michael*

Michael (quietly, almost crying): "I'm so sorry" 

*music changes to happier, more nostalgic music*

*a picture of Michael, Reese and Shannon all together, talking appears, with the text "Three Idiots- One Podcast"*

*picture is replaced by Michael, Reese and Shannon on a zoom call. All of them have broken character and are laughing really hard at something. Text appears in sparkles- The 30 Second Podcast*

*zoom call fades out and the screen goes black*

*Text appears on the black background: "Tune in Wednesday 7/29/20 @ 10:30am HST" as music fades to silence*

*one last dramatic violin note*